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- Our three contestants, in front of flannel.
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- The three beers.
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- Henry Weinhard’s
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- Olympia
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- Rainier
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- The three beers, left to right, Rainier, Olympia, Henry Weinhard’s
Northwest Cheap Beer Olympics
The Pacific Northwest is known nationally for its good beer. Nowhere else in our fair nation is beer taken more seriously and nowhere else is there such a proliferation of breweries, breweries that continually try new styles and win nationally and internationally in beer contests. My home town of Bend, Oregon claims to have the most breweries per capita of any city in the country (we have seven for a city of 80,000) and Portland has the most breweries of any city in the world and in recent tourist information has been calling itself “Beervana” (also the name of a recent OPB documentary about the history of brewing in Oregon). If there is anyplace in the world the discerning beer connoisseur like myself should feel at home and be happy, it is here, and indeed in a different time and clime I had dreams about a “land where great beer flows like the mighty Columbia; wide, strong and plentiful,” but for some reason good beer has bored me since my triumphant return. Instead of good beer being a delicious treat, something rarely seen, it’s as easy as driving down to the local Safeway here and having more microbrews to choose from than if I had gone to a specialty store in the south. It’s nerve racking now to have 7 different stouts to choose from and 8 different IPA’s. Not that I’m complaining at all, it’s just a bit overwhelming to have a whole wall of deliciousness to choose from every time I go to pick up avocados and bratwurst.
But even while taking in all the delicious beer out here (and gizzing in my pants every time I go to the grocery store), these good beers seem so commonplace here and sometimes so inaccessible in price that I can’t help but think what an unemployed beer drinker in an economically depressed Pacific Northwest logging town would drink. And since I filed my first unemployment claim yesterday, I decided that good beer is a luxury now and I need to start drinking the best cheap beer I can find. Lucky for me, the northwest has cheap beer brands that exist nowhere else in the country, so I still have new beers to explore and enjoy while still being able to pay the electric. So one boring Thursday afternoon, I decided to take the rest of the day off and sit down to decide who reins supreme in the realm of cheap northwest beer. Granted, I don’t even think two of the beers are even brewed in the northwest any longer, but the fact that even after their breweries were bought out and shut down (and turned into trendy lofts and bars) by larger conglomerates they are still being produced, must either be a testament to their greatness or at least to the sort of brand loyalty they have.
The three beers I chose for this beer Olympics have long and storied histories in the northwest. Henry Weinhard’s is supposedly “the northwest’s original beer”, and Henry Weinhard was the first brewer to set up shop in the Oregon territory after coming west in the 1850’s, created a beer empire and even tried to convince the city of Portland to install a beer fountain. Olympia, the second contestant, was founded by German immigrants in the late 1800’s in Olympia, Washington and was drunk by a young Dustin Hoffman in the film “The Graduate.” Rainier, also started in the late 1800’s, was brewed in Seattle, Washington and was known for their funny beer ads, actually a first in the business. Also the band Mudhoney in their promotional shots for their first album are shown rolling around in a pile of empty Rainier cans. None of these beers are brewed in their original locations having gone the way of most older American beer brands, unable to compete with Miller, Budweiser and with the new microbrews, they were bought out and shut down in the late 1990’s. Sorta sad, but hey, that’s the way capitalism works.
And now for the contest part: First how I chose these beers. To be included in this contest, a twelve pack of the beer had to cost less than ten dollars, this being a contest for the poor and unemployed. Second, the beer had to either be made in the Northwest or have some sort of historical connection to the Northwest. Third, the beer had to be readily available. How I conducted the contest: I poured each of the three beers out into 12 ounce pint glasses, tasted them individually in no particular order, wrote down what they tasted like and what I thought of them and then arbitrarily decided a winner based on my opinion. Unfortunately, the results may be a little skewed because Henry’s came in a bottle and the other two beers came in cans, but hey, this a cheap beer contest.
Rainier comes in a white, red and gold can and proudly proclaims the use of Yakima valley hops. I purchased a 24 pack of twelve-ounce cans at Bi-Mart for $13, so it definitely wins in the price contest. Pouring it out of the can, it looks light and golden and initially provided a frothy head that wasted into nothing very quickly. Rainier looked the lightest in color out of the three beers, even though they all looked light. Upon tasting there is an initial hops taste wasting off into nothing with a mild, slightly sweet aftertaste. It’s really bland tasting and reminds me of Coors, it’s pretty watery and about one of the easiest beers I’ve ever drunk. It’s so easy to drink I could see an unemployed mill worker drinking one with his eggs in the morning. Putting my nose in the glass, the smell it gives off smells like industry. It’s really not all that great.
Olympia comes in a blue, cream and gold can and its slogan tells you “it’s the water.” A twelve pack at Bi-Mart cost $7.35 so it is slightly more expensive than Rainier, but still cheap. Pouring it into the can, it initially had some head but it disappeared very quickly, much like the Rainier. It was the darkest in color of the three beers, but still had a light golden hay like color. Tasting it, it had an almost hearty taste the sort of beer that can fill you up and it reminded me a lot of Pabst Blue Ribbon. It has an initial malt taste going into a mild hop after taste. It is very smooth and easy, and smells like a sweet syrupy nectar of deliciousness.
Henry Weinhard’s Private Reserve comes in short stubby brown bottles with a black and gold label. A twelve pack of bottles cost $8.99 at Bi-Mart, which makes it the most expensive of the three. I really like the bottles; they are sturdier and less likely to fall over than taller longnecks and sort of have an old school appeal that I like. Pouring the beer out, it looks very effervescent and bubbly, like champagne. It provided a good head, which remained the entire time, winning the head contest. It tastes like a real Pilsner style lager should taste, and reminds me of beers similar in style that I had in Germany, and not a mass-produced American macro lager. The initial taste has a taste that is distinctly Cascade hops without being too strong in the way that Cascade hops can be. This initial hops taste then melds into a sweet malt taste. This beer is extremely well rounded a little hoppy, a little malty without being too much of either. It honestly tastes as good as beers that cost far more than it does, and so I say it’s a bargain for the price. The beer smells like America and the northwest, clean and delicious.
So the champion in the Northwest Cheap Beer Olympics is Henry Weinhard’s, second place goes to Olympia, and third is awarded to Rainier. If you have the money, I probably wouldn’t recommend drinking any of these beers given all the amazing beers brewed here in the northwest, but if even a six pack of Mirror Pond is out of reach, or you just want something light and refreshing on a hot, dry, high desert day, you really couldn’t go wrong with any of these beers.
PROST!
The three beers.
The three beers, left to right, Rainier, Olympia, Henry Weinhard's
